Dear Jazzy: Once a cheater, always a cheater

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Dear Jazzy,

What is up Jazz? I need some help and advice. My boyfriend Sam (not his real name) has been fooling around behind my back. I let him slide before. I tried to forgive. I do not want to be alone. I do not have a lot of guys lining up to take me out, so I do not want to break up. Now he tells me he has herpes. I have not been intimate with him since he told me. I do not know what to do. I am really struggling with this decision.


– Jess


Dear Jess,

Thanks for reaching out and it seems your relationship is in quite some trouble.

First of all, I am sorry that your boyfriend “Sam” has been unfaithful. I feel that everyone can relate with this unfortunate incident in one way or another.

But you know what they say, once a cheater, always a cheater. That sounds a little pessimistic, but all I am being is realistic. This “Sam” has cheated on you before and I commend you on trying to forgive him, but you need to realize that he is not respecting you by cheating on you.

If the only reason you are staying with him is because you do not want to be alone and you do not have guys lining up to take you out, then that is a poor excuse.

Being in an unhealthy relationship is toxic to your emotional health and apparently now to your physical health since he has contracted herpes.

Realize that you do not have to settle for a cheating jerk who does not even have the common decency to wear protection, because he is not only hurting himself, but every other sexual partner and even you.

My advice is to break up and not to go out with anyone right away, because you are obviously not ready. Use your newfound time to work on yourself and build up your self-confidence and self-worth.

Best of luck,