The Voice of San Jose City College since 1956

City College Times

Dear Jazzy


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Editor’s Note: Jazzy has taken some well-deserved vacation and we hope she enjoys it. So all Dear Jazzy questions sent in will be answered by her good friend Sincerely Sal. He’s here to give advice to all who seek it. Send in your letters by dropping them off in the Technology Center or email them in to [email protected]

Hey Sal,
I have been going out with this girl for a little under a year. Recently, I’ve met this new girl and we talk constantly. Our conversations are so fun and I feel like I might be catching “the feels”. Don’t get me wrong, I really like my girlfriend, but it seems to me that this new girl and I have a great connection. When we talk it seems like I have no worries in the world. I feel bad because I met this new girl through my girlfriend at a party we went to. We haven’t done anything besides talk, but I feel like I prefer conversations and hanging out with her over conversations with my girlfriend. What do I do?
-Ed

Hello Ed,
Sounds like you are in a predicament. It seems like you and this new girl enjoy each other’s company. There is nothing wrong with this, you can be in a relationship and talk to others as long as you aren’t running around and being sneaky behind their back.

However, you say you are catching some feelings for this girl. Catching feelings for two different people is a dangerous path to travel so I suggest you tread it lightly. You might really have a future with this new girl, but in order to know for sure it would require you to break your current girlfriend’s heart and break up with her. I know this could be hard but it is better than going behind her back and cheating on her with her own friend. It’s best to be honest in these situations.

Dating is to find that person who you really want to be with, and if you definitely found somebody who you want to be with, then I think you should go for it. Of course it will be hard, but in the long run it will be best for you and your girlfriend because you shouldn’t be with somebody if you there is another person you like more. Both of you guys deserve to be happy. The further this goes on while you are in a relationship the chance of it ending well becomes less and less likely.

The best advice I have for you is to be honest with your girlfriend and tell her the truth about how you feel. She might be crushed at first, but she will appreciate the honesty in the long run. This will allow you to step back and think if you truly like this new girl or if she is just a fling. If you realize that your current girlfriend is the one for you, then you can always try to win her back, and you’ll have a better shot since you were honest and upfront from the beginning. If you act shady and get caught then you will surely lose your current girlfriend. Make sure the choice you make is what you really want because it’ll affect more than just you. Don’t be afraid to do what you want to do. You deserve to have the girl that makes you happy and I hope the one you choose does just that.
Sincerely,
Sal

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The Voice of San Jose City College since 1956
Dear Jazzy